问号

人是矛盾的，我是矛盾的。

当我在不停的鼓励自己时，我会不知觉的认为自己是失败的。

我时常希望我能再多努力一点，但往往在自己疲惫不堪时轻易放弃。

我经常认为向人求助很容易，但真正遇到困难时却不知所措。

我希望独立，但总是发觉自己很幼稚。

我应该是个乐观主义者，但时常也有很悲观的想法。

或许我带着一个笑脸面具，摘不下，看不见里面的那个我，还天真地认为那个假面具就是我。

我不明白自己，更不图别人能理解我。

天灰灰

life sucks school sucks, great depression

at this point in time, some one please HELP ME. yes, im so desperated in needing help. my grade sucks and i don believe in miracle . i have to improve my grade OR else my whole life is ARHHHH

此时此刻，偶，雨吉心情非常的沮丧。一肚子的怨气憋得好难受。我的成绩怎么还是原地踏步呢。。郁闷。。

chat (random)

the reason why i don like to stay 'online' in msn is because i will always receive email requests and out of these seemingly normal emails, many of them are what i refer them as 'messenger porn-er'. these ppl will start a chat in a very friendly and flirty way.

8/july/2010 11.20pm
because exam has just finished, so i decided to sign in to msn (after many many weeks). the first chat box is from this stranger, called tracy.
she does her self intro and tells me where she lives, also requesting for cam chat.

she: hello!
i say: hi, u're?
she: im tracy. 21f/Cali. u don mind chatting?
i say: i don mind, but im busy now.(was a bit curious abt wat she will say so i intend to stay abit longer. other times, i will just delete the email)
she: where did u live?
i: eropagnis (it is singapore)
she: oh, let's have cam chat. i love flirting with mine ;)
i: im busy, maybe another time
she: u want to have cam chat. u want to see me. i don really do cam chatting in this account as people have recorded me last time
i: im busy if u don leave me alone, i will have to block u (was wondering if i keep repeating this, will she lose interest..)
she: ok. please go to XXXXX.com if u cant see me that means it's a private video but im always available to make ur video.

....i din reply. after 5mins, she send the website address again.. lol

ok. delete email.

cherries, loads loads of cherries

love my dad, he knows that i like cherries, so he bought 10kg(with an offer price) but still, i was pretty surprise:) just imagine i get to eat 15 cherries a day!
btw, for ppl who has never tasted a cherry(fresh not CANNED), must try.
LOOK at them, they are so fresh~~

AND, i really need to start worikng right after A's, saved up and buy a DSLR(digital single reflex lens), it's such a babe~
i need it to take nice, good quality artistic photos! yoy know it's kind of frastruting when there are soo many ideas in ur mind and because of the absence of a good camera, u cant do anything.

the 'BEST' ever...

=.=

this is soo LAME

我看了要喷血~~

生日歌

隔壁哪个小孩过生日，一家大小在为她庆生。好熟悉的音乐，让我好怀念。我还记得那时的我，小不点一个，喜欢热闹，被许多人爱的感觉，所以总有一大伙人为我唱生日歌。那时，一家人住在一个大院子里，总能找到玩伴，一起跳绳，踢毽子，捕蝴蝶，捉蚱蜢，跳房子，乘凉。记得那时养了小狗，几只小猫和小鸭，还有一个小菜园和小池塘。对了，还有一个小黑板和一大盒彩色粉笔。


很多人说我的到来是个宝，大家为我拍了许多成长照片，一直都被珍藏着。


但许多记忆都还留在中国，好想回家看看。