someone who i love the most

what is respect, who do i respect? when i was beening asked, i thought of my grandfather. a person who gave up his education for work as well as looked after of his brothers and sisters, so that their education will be ensured. he shows great love for his siblings and responsility in eveything he does. he never gives up, never retreats from the harsh reality. he studied only when his siblings grew up and become more independent; he study only after work everyday without failed. he borrowed books, keep reading, read again when he forgot. no one taught him how to behave, no one taught him any skills, but, but, he is not taken aback, he is not complaining abt why life is so unfair, instead he faced all the challenges calmly, do what he should do and what is right. this is the person who taught, the siblings, my mom and me, the morality of life and shared his knowledge which gathered from years of experience.

Happy Chinese New Year!

lovely

owl city Fireflies

wonderful lyric with sweet song plus amazing MV are its bonus.

a thousand sheeps, a simple hope

if i have a choice, i wouldnt want many events to occur in my life. but, life is the way it is, unpreditable and impossible to manipulate, i always left with no options but to face it, sometimes alone.
life is a jizzle puzzle, we cant really see what this picture is about, where life is leading us to until we complete the last piece. and there is no guarentee for a good result. so, often, i felt disappointed and start to questioning my own ability, eventually lowing my self-esteem.
sometime, i feel so helpless and miserable to be awake the next day as i wasnt prepare to face the old and the new challenges. i fear to lose, feeling dismay after hearing all the criticisms..
i prayed ... hard... every night, hoping to regain my nearly drained fighting spirit and strength..

sometime i cry, breaking down infront of hurdles which are too high for me to cross. i wish life could spare me some little moments of peace, for me to release the burdens and the uncertainty accumulated in my heart. allow me to act like a girl i used to be, crying like a baby. 24/7 pretending to be strong is tiring and insane.
i need a moment of silence. but i ask for no sympathy .. please dont destroy my last bit of pride